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| Captured Dictator Faces Stoning with Expensive Rocks Halliburton Rocks for Saddam |
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The employee said Halliburton is charging from $50 to $150 per stone, exceeding the monthly pay of even high-ranking officers in the new Iraqi Army. “Halliburton is simply a model of the capitalist system,” one Halliburton official in Iraq said, “It’s all about supply and demand.” Halliburton said they were literally caught been Iraq and a very hard and dangerous place from which to extract stone. “These stones are symbols of three decades of Iraqi frustration, and they’re about as popular as a “Mission Accomplished” action figure of George W. Bush, dressed in a Navy flyer suit.” The Halliburton stone imports to Iraq started selling just hours after Saddam Hussein was captured coming out of a dirt hole near his home town of Tikrit. Saddam told his captors he was relieved by his own capture, after having to live in a snake hole despite working as a greeter at the new Tikrit Wal-Mart. The capture, however, opened a can of worms about what to do with the deposed dictator after giving him a “fair trial.” Bush himself says it should be members of the “coalition of the willing” that get an opportunity to meet Saddam head on. “Let him who is without debt-paying expectations cast the first stone,” Bush said in his godly tone. The statement appears to be still another affirmation that the Bush administration will favor those countries that either fought his war or forgive some of Saddam Hussein’s accumulated debt. Democrats running for President next year also expressed mixed emotions about what to do with Saddam after his “fair trial.” Senator Joseph Lieberman expressed regret that for the second time in a week a major force in his life had failed to notify him in advance. “If Saddam had told me in advance he was going to endorse the Bush campaign machine, I would have at least had time to prepare a statement,” the senator said. “At least he didn’t join the (Howard) Deaniacs like some people I know.” Former House Speaker Richard Gephardt said Saddam should be petrified and shaped into a touring model of what a “miserable failure” looks like. Remember that he is a creation of George H.W. Bush’s CIA House of “Spooks.” John Kerry reportedly told Rolling Stone magazine that “Saddam is an a**hole — big time!” But still, the Massachusetts Senator said Saddam should be considered innocent until proven insane. Democratic frontrunner Dean, however, pointed out that Saddam and his Baathist could be rehabilitated and like Southern white guys with confederate flags on their pickup trucks, could represent a new opportunity for Democratic Party ideals. Suggestions from the Iraqi people that lived under Saddam’s rule for three decades ranged from death to giving the dictator tickets to center field at the next Chicago Cubs playoff game in Wrigley Field, where he could easily interfere with a ball in play. Other suggestions included walking through a Silicon Valley unemployment office pretending to be George W. Bush. “We want only the second worst end for Saddam, one Iraqi father said, as he stood near the grave of his three-year old son killed in a coalition ‘shock and awe’ raid last spring, “We reserve the absolute worst for George W. Bush.” |
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The same Pentagon
that last week accused Halliburton of excessive charges in gasoline deliveries
to Iraq, now says the oil services company is overcharging on its latest
mission. “Halliburton is delivering rocks and stones for the expected
stoning of Saddam Hussein as if they were imported from a South African
diamond mine,” one career Pentagon employee said.